A prayer that I often pray over our family is “LORD turn the hearts of the children to their father and the heart of the father to the children.” (Malachi 4:6) I have a working husband (and I stay home) who gets parenting and babysitting confused (LOVE you honey)! Some of you can relate and those that don’t I pray you know my heart. The Lord really revealed to me this morning that I need to put my own name in there too! I am mom and of course I love my children BUT is my heart always turned towards them? Sadly, no.
We have five children ranging from 1 to almost 8, and we homeschool. This morning as the aforementioned revelation fell on me afresh, many other things “dawned” on me too! HOMESCHOOL! That word right there in bold letters is probably why I need to pray that prayer the most. They are with me ALL the time and it is so easy to take their little lives for granted and to feel burdened over blessed.
It is only (or ALREADY depending on how the moment is going) Wednesday, and so far we have listened to our Classical Conversations Week 19 Memory Work ONLY! Wait, I did manage to get them to sit and watch What’s In The Bible with Buck Denver on Monday before art classes! That counts as Bible and devotion time, right?
Most days are a struggle. Some days we do nothing but spend the whole day trying to die so we can live! Figuratively, of course! Our house is one strong-willed personality up against another, up against another, up against another (however many times until that equals the 7 of us!). So I spend my day trying to die to myself and my expectations and yield to God AND trying to get all the kids to die to self in order to build some godly character! The immediate lesson of the heart usually trumps the written lesson. AND THAT’S OK!
On those days though I daydream, even if for a moment, of sending them to school! Bus at 7:30 and home at 4:30. WOW! Do you know what I could do!!!?? I could read my Bible and do Bible Study. I could PRAY and listen! I could clean my home! I could shower consistently. I could do volunteer work. I could cook gourmet meals. I could teach the baby a foreign language or his colors! I would have an awesome relationship with my kids! We wouldn’t always be in a deadlock match of cleaning rooms or doing math or learning what they think is sooo boring. I wouldn’t have to always be the bad guy. I wouldn’t have to fight!
Then I realize the central subject is “I”. My heart turned to a “me” mentality. And I realize that I AM doing all those thing, just more as a life-application approach! A hands-on stlye, kinesthetic style! I am being given an opportunity to take what I have learn in my prayer time and Bible study and USE it! I am volunteering all of who I am to my family and the legacy I am leaving behind. I AM teaching the baby a foreign language and cooking some pretty awesome meals on occasion! I am showing them that the people you love are worth fighting for and with! I am showing them that I won’t give up on them and I will fight for my family and Jesus with everything I have!
I pray that the Lord bonds us all closer together through these years versus some of us ending up with some life-long issues! I pray that the Lord turns the hearts of the children to their mother and the heart of the mother to her children. I pray that the Lord will remain steadfastly standing in the gap, because I loose to my flesh more than I like. I pray that my children see that I am doing my best and that I love the Lord! I pray that the can see glimpses of Jesus in who I am!
A promise I cling to when things get hard and I wanna quit is this, “Let us not become weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest IF WE DO NOT GIVE UP.” Galatians 6:9
Lord I thank you that I can do anything and everything through You! I thank you that through You I can do good and not grow weary! I thank you Jesus for Your help sowing the seeds and can’t wait to the fruition of the harvest!